Gaslighting 101

Strap in folks. This ole ram has penned another long one:

In 2022, the Merriam-Webster dictionary declared “gaslighting” to be the word of the year.

Around here, you probably think of the Gaslight District of Petoskey when you hear the term. Those charming streetlights in Petoskey’s downtown hung with wreaths and red ribbons during the holiday season.

But the reason Merriam-Webster gave the honor to the word “gaslighting” was far from charming. The term comes from a 1944 film with Ingrid Bergman called “Gas Light.” (There was a play and TV movie before, but Bergman is the best so we can start there). In the film a husband lies and manipulates his wife into believing she is crazy. Slowly, she becomes more isolated and seemingly delusional as gas lights flicker on and off in her mind.

You get the picture. Maybe you’ve even been in a relationship where you felt that way.

We’ve read what appears to be a transition post over on the petition people’s Facebook page. After a long history of their efforts the post concludes, “Let's all work together to get what we want. We are we. There is no longer two sides.”

It’s as if all the acrimony, the harassment, the disruption of public meetings, the name calling, the shaming, the motive questioning, the bad-faith arguments, the misleading postcards and texts, the fermenting of distrust, the causing scenes at the Farmers Market didn’t happen.

Even the name of their organization says, “we love harbor springs” with a very clearly implied, “and you don’t.”

Nearly every interaction with the petition people was built on a foundation of grievance.

So, here we are. They have gotten everything they have asked for, including a public vote, and now, “There [are] no longer two sides.” Well, that’s handy.

They are collecting funds to run a slate of city council candidates to defeat members of the council and community leaders. They are working to beat those who trusted our neighbors and supported the good work of the planning commission. But they say there are no longer two sides.

Now, to be fair, at least one of their supported candidates says on Facebook they are not affiliated with the group. The other makes us all face the sticky question: If the End Days are truly near, why worry about zoning codes? And their Mayoral candidate, I kid you not, owns the largest realty company in town. Distancing themselves is likely a smart move.

BUT LET US BE PERFECTLY CLEAR.

There are, in fact, two very distinct sides. Literally.

You can vote “yes” to repeal the new zoning code or “no” to keep it and support the work of our neighbors.

You can vote for those who champion common sense changes and don’t trade in inuendo and bad-faith arguments or you can choose the people taking advantage of acrimony to get elected.

They are using false equivalence to take no responsibility for their prior bad acts and terrible positions. Don't let them.

Saying two things, which are clearly different, are the same is a hallmark of gaslighting and we will call it out every time. Vote NO. It is the side that supports your friends and neighbors here in Harbor Springs.

Remember, all the reasons to vote NO and support the new code and the volunteers who helped to put it together are at www.votenoharborsprings.org

Whew! Felling better already! Thank you for reading, caring and sharing!